Sighentists, Metapsychiatrists and East Indian Gurus Discover
a New Chakra ... the Clown Chakra!
Report to this Web-site!
LaughingCow, New Jersey, U.S.A.): Sighentists, Metapsychiatrists,
and East Indian Gurus in conference here have found that
the problems of humanity can be placed under one heading:
"Seriousness is the leading cause of everything
from Cancer to Reincarnation," Chair-Clown Dr.
Won Wurhldview announced today at the Bi-Millenia Meeting
of the World Council of Spiritual Frivoloty.
an incredibly rare and possibly unprecedented move of not
wanting to be accused of discovering a cause without also
discovering a way of naturally healing the cause, the sighentists
here have pin-pointed a psychic energy point located between
the heart chakra and the throat chakra which they have studied
exhaustively and which they feel is key to understanding
how to find relief:
The Clown Chakra!
"If people are feeling miserable, if they have financial
problems, if their relationship is the pits, if they are
in ill health, if they find a need to sue people, if they
find fault with their siblings, then obviously, their Clown
Chakra is closed," No-Bell Sighentist Dr. Honks
"When this happens, our multi-national team have
observed, using high-powered, state of the art microscopy,
that the cells of every organ display a sad face."
Dr. Hisworth further states that in close meditative collaboration
with the East Indian Gurus on the team, all have self-realized
that if people have become ill, it is because their minds
have projected guilt onto the cells of the body and have
forced out the love that is normally found within each cell
of the body. "The cells are therefore saying, I
lack love,or ILL for short," intoned
Sri Sri Ha-Ha-Ha. "After many millenia of meditative
musing, we have determined that all disease is due to the
fact that the cells are out of ease, or dis-eased,"
Dr. Lettit Goh observed: "When the Clown Chakra
is opened and working (er, playing) properly, its psychic
mechanisms suck up misery, pain, anger, resentment, grievances,
unhappiness, etc., and convert the energy into tiny red
red heart-shaped ballons contain Love and Joy. These balloons
are then directed to the dis-eased cells or situation, and
a happy face appears instantly."
these red, heart-shaped balloons are called endorphins,
due to the fact that when anyone experiences them, the feeling
of separation ends. They experience being back home with
All That Is and hence are no longer an orphan. This
is the well-known end-orphan (endorphin) effect,"
Dr. Goh concluded.
So if you think someone is attacking you, the authorities
here recommend that you visualize sending that person red,
heart-shaped balloons filled with Love and Joy.
Keep your Clown Chakra open! Laugh!
Liz has significantly played with ... er, enhanced ... an
email attributed to John Morton in this article. Thank you,
Mr. Morton, for the inspiration! Dr. Liz
Elizabeth Severino, D.D., D.R.S.
Home | Meet Elizabeth |
Client Services | Online
Appearances, Workshops & Classes | Elizabeth's Store
Order Online | Best Buddies
| Contact Elizabeth
In the News | Testimonials